You've got questions. We've got answers.
We're often asked questions about writing. Because many of the questions are similar, former Workshop director Tim Bete created this page with his answers. We both hope you find it helpful and highly recommend the books at the right for more detailed information.
Keep writing!
Matthew Dewald
Director, Erma Bombeck Writers' Workshop
How do I become a columnist?
Write a column.
No, how do I become a paid columnist?
Write a column and sell it.
I think I'm being unclear about my question. How do I write a column and sell it to 500 newspaper so I can become as famous and rich as Dave Barry?
If your goal is become (a) famous or (b) rich, there are more effective ways than writing to achieve your goals. It's good to assess your goals so you're clear about what you want to accomplish. I highly recommend The Truth about Writing by Michael Allen, if you can find a copy of it.
In his book, Allen writes: "Unfortunately, those writers who earn large sums of money from their work are definitely in the minority, and it is now time to come down to earth...It would be extremely unwise to assume that you, yourself, are going to be an exception to that rule."
Allen continues: "If you really must be famous, you would be well advised to find some simpler and quicker route to the front pages of the newspapers than is available to those who write. Making your name through the hard slog of writing books and scripts is a very long way round the houses."
While these quotes make it appear that Allen is pessimistic, overall his book takes an optimistic -- yet realistic -- view of writing. Allen is an accomplished writer himself. I came away inspired after reading his book.
Are you trying to discourage me?
Absolutely not. I would never discourage a writer from working to achieve his or her dreams. But having a realistic optimism is necessary to fuel the persistence required to reach those dreams. At least that's been my experience.
If I can't become rich and famous, why bother writing?
Great question. Writers have been asking and answering that question for decades. I like Kurt Vonnegut's answer best:
“Many people need desperately to receive this message: ‘I feel and think much as you do, care about many of the things you care about, although most people don’t care about them. You are not alone.’”
Write because you love to write -- not because you enjoy the adulation that may come from having written.
You can read my longer answer here.
My family thinks my writing is hysterical. Is that a good indication of whether I can sell my column?
Not unless someone in your family is the editor of a newspaper or magazine, or knows an editor to whom you can be introduced.
Okay, okay, so I have a healthy, realistic optimism...
How do I get syndicated?
The best way to begin is to get your local newspaper to carry your column. As a general rule of thumb, newspapers pay between $0.50 and $0.75 per thousand subscribers for a weekly column. That's $12.50 for a circulation of 25,000.
Once you have six to eight clips, send copies to several of the large syndicates and see what happens. Here are links to several of the large syndicates. Editor & Publisher prints an annual syndicate directory, too. The list of books at the right also includes several syndication resources.
Here are some interesting articles about syndication:
What about self-syndicating?
Many columnists decide to self-syndicate their columns. After they have six to eight clips, they begin sending query letters directly to newspapers. I think there is a greater likelihood of success in self-syndication.
Here are some interesting articles about self-syndication:
How can I promote my writing using the Internet?
You can find eight ways here. The marketing books at the right are also great resources.
I have a great idea for a book and want to find an agent or publisher. What should I say in my query letter?
You can find some great advice from publishing guru Steve O'Keefe here. This type of query letter can be used for pitching an agent or publisher.
What should I put in my book proposal?
You can see what I used to sell my first book here.
Here are some interesting articles about book proposals:
Couldn't find an answer to your question?
Contact us.
Matthew Dewald
Director, Erma Bombeck Writers' Workshop
University of Dayton
300 College Park
Dayton, OH 45469-2963
Books recommended
by Tim Bete
Purchasing book from these links helps support the Erma Bombeck Writers' Workshop.
HUMOR WRITING
How to Write Funny: Add Humor to Every Kind of Writing
by John B. Kachuba
The Comedy Bible : From Stand-up to Sitcom--The Comedy Writer's Ultimate "How To" Guide
by Judy Carter
Comedy Writing Secrets
by Melvin Helitzer
What Are You Laughing at: How to Write Funny Screenplays, Stories, & More
by Brad Schreiber
GENERAL WRITING
On Writing
by Stephen King
Bird by Bird : Some Instructions on Writing and Life
by Anne Lamott
Writing Down the Bones
by Natalie Goldberg
Become a published writer
MARKETING YOUR WRITING
The Frugal Book Promoter: How to Do What Your Publisher Won't
by Carolyn Howard-Johnson
Guerrilla Marketing for Writers : 100 Weapons to Help You Sell Your Work
by Jay Conrad Levinson, Rick Frishman, Michael Larsen
2005 Writers Market
by Kathryn S. Brogan, Robert Lee Brewer
Christian Writers' Market Guide
by Sally Stuart
FINDING AN AGENT
Book Proposals That Sell, 21 Secrets To Speed Your Success
by Terry Whalin
Making the Perfect Pitch: How to Catch a Literary Agent's Eye
by Katharine Sands
Guide to Literary Agents 2005
by Kathryn S. Brogan
BOOK PROPOSALS & CONTRACTS
Write the Perfect Book Proposal: 10 That Sold and Why
by Jeff Herman, Deborah Levine Herman
Kirsch's Guide to the Book Contract: For Authors, Publishers, Editors and Agents by Jonathan Kirsch
Negotiating a Book Contract: A Guide for Authors, Agents and Lawyers
by Mark L. Levine
SYNDICATION
Syndication Secrets: 10 Must-Do, Tried and True Rules In Getting Syndicated
by Jodie Lynn
Successful Syndication: A Guide for Writers and Cartoonists
by Michael Sedge
BOOK MARKETING
The Frugal Book Promoter: How to Do What Your Publisher Won't
by Carolyn Howard-Johnson
Publicize Your Book!: An Insider's Guide to Getting Your Book the Attention It Deserves
by Jacqueline Deval
The Savvy Author's Guide to Book Publicity
by Lissa Warren
The Self-Publishing Manual: How to Write, Print, and Sell Your Own Book
by Dan Poynter
1001 Ways to Market Your Books
by John Kremer
MAGAZINES
Writers Digest
ACADEMIC BOOKS
Encyclopedia of 20th-Century American Humor
by Alleen Nilsen, Don L.F. Nilsen
Writing Humor: Creativity and the Comic Mind (Humor in Life and Letters)
by Mary Ann Rishel
Merry Wives and Others: A History of Domestic Humor Writing
by Penelope Fritzer, Bartholomew Bland
Purchasing book from these links helps support the Erma Bombeck Writers' Workshop.
